Shay Family Members

Throughout the series, Carly and Spencer sometimes mention or hint at members of the Shay family.

Granddad Shay
Granddad Shay is the grandfather of Carly and Spencer Shay and also the father of Colonel Steven Shay and the husband of Gramma Shay.

He lives in Yakima, Washington. He usually visits his grandchildren, Carly and Spencer.

His first appearance was in iWanna Stay With Spencer, when he wanted to take Carly to the city of Yakima after Spencer caused her to almost get hit in the head with a hammer. After several failed attempts to change his mind, he allowed Carly to live with Spencer when Spencer revealed he had kept Carly's asthma inhaler "just in case" although Carly hadn't had an asthma attack for years. In this episode, it was also mentioned that he didn't agree with Spencer's choice to become an artist. He also appeared in iBreak A World Record.

Granddad Shay appeared in the revival series in the episode iHire a New Assistant, where he comes to visit Spencer and Carly. Carly hires her granddad to be her assistant when she finds she is too busy, but eventually has to fire him.

Colonel Steven Shay
Colonel Steven Shay is Carly and Spencer's father. He is a Colonel in the U.S. Air Force and currently on a tour of duty in a United States submarine somewhere near Anchorage, Alaska. It has been implied he may be in some kind of classified work. This is assumed because Spencer mentions to Carly in iWon't Cancel The Show, that she probably shouldn't give away their father's current position.

Dan Schneider, the producer of iCarly, cleared up the confusion about if he was in the Navy, or in the Air Force; he was in the Air Force on a Navy Submarine (This makes sense, as the U.S. Navy does not have Colonels, since the equivalent Officer rank in the U.S. Navy is Captain).

While he clearly loves and cares about both of his children, Colonel Shay has displayed a bit of an attitude towards Spencer, such as when he and Spencer were talking over the phone and Spencer told him about Oystomato, but Colonel Shay said he didn't care.

Spencer still hadn't told him that he dropped out of law school, according to iSpace Out and iMeet The First Lady.

He calls Spencer and Carly in iStill Psycho to make sure they and Carly's friends were okay after being kidnapped by Nora Dershlit (he saw it on the news).

The plot in iMeet The First Lady revolves around Sam and Freddie trying to help Carly stay in touch with her father on his birthday because he is not able to make it home as originally planned.

He appeared in the series finale, iGoodbye, to take Carly to a special father/daughter dance. During an iCarly webcast held in the episode, he finally finds out that Spencer dropped out of law school. While initially angry, he seems to get over it and accepts that not being a lawyer is what Spencer wants, and agrees to send Spencer more money in the future.

Mrs. Shay
Throughout the series, nothing is ever mentioned of Carly and Spencer's mom--it's also never confirmed if Spencer and Carly have the same mother, as they could potentially be paternal half-siblings (meaning they have the same father but different mothers), as half-siblings in general tend to have to large age differences. It is unclear what kind of relationship they had with this woman either if they had any. During a YouTube video of Jerry Trainor, when he was asked where Carly and Spencer's mother was, and he responded, "I don't know, shopping I guess," while laughing.

In the episode iStakeout, Mrs. Benson says to Spencer, "Spencer, you have a stain on your shirt, go put on a fresh one!". Spencer then replies, "But you're not my mother!"

It's possible that she is deceased (which would make Colonel Shay a widower), but assuming that Mrs. Shay is still alive, it can assumed that she and Colonel Shay are divorced, separated or were possibly never married in the first place. Also, assuming that Mrs. Shay is in fact still alive, she's clearly not involved in Carly and Spencer's lives--for example, as shown in iWanna Stay with Spencer, if anything were to happen to Spencer where he couldn't act as legal guardian: Carly would have to go live with their paternal grandfather rather some other relative, such as her mother.

Nevel questions the absence of Carly's mother in the Sam & Cat episode, #SuperPsycho, but Sam just walks away. Nathan Kress has stated that he didn't know what happened to Carly's mom.

Her inexplicable absence is referenced in the 2021 revival, where Carly is asked about what her parents do. She offers an explanation about her dad, but when questioned about her mom she awkwardly changes the subject.

iHire a New Assistant implies that Mrs Shay is dead as Carly says that Granddad Shay is really the only family she and Spencer have as their father is always away.

However, on the nick.com page of iCarly, it says both of Carly's parents are out at sea, but this is likely not accurate due to what is implied in the revival series. This could mean that it was retconned.

Gramma Shay
Gramma Shay is the paternal grandmother of Carly and Spencer Shay. She is never mentioned on the show.

Great Grammy Shay
Great Grammy Shay is Carly and Spencer's deceased great grandmother. Her diamond encrusted watch was destroyed in a fire in iGot a Hot Room and Spencer got $82,000 for it. He spent it all on Carly's new room. Apparently, Carly and Spencer didn't attend her funeral.

Aunt Margaret
Aunt Margaret is Carly and Spencer's aunt who was mentioned in iMove Out. According to Spencer, she pronounced window "winder". She died of a heart attack.

Credits to

 * iCarly Wiki on Fandom